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That Festive Feeling? Sadly not!

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  • That Festive Feeling? Sadly not!

    Sorry to go on but things are getting to me a bit at the moment, hence my latest blog post...

    http://eljay1980.wordpress.com/2008/...ing-sadly-not/

    I hope everyone is having a better festive time than us *hugs*

    Here's hoping that 2009 can only get better.

    Love Laura xxx

  • #2
    Oh hun, I don't know what I can say to make anything better. {{{{huge hugs}}}} for you.

    I suppose you have to find some positive in life and know that you are in a loving caring relationship now and that you have left the horrible people behind. Try not to let them or their actions get to you, that is what they would want. You are better than them and have found the strength to move away and make life better for yourself. You are a good person, don't forget that.

    Take care,
    Elinor
    x

    My Misi page
    Follow me on Twitter

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    • #3
      These are two favourite poems of mine...




      Do not stand at my grave and weep


      Do not stand at my grave and weep,
      I am not there, I do not sleep.

      I am a thousand winds that blow.
      I am the diamond glint on snow.
      I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
      I am the gentle autumn rain.

      When you wake in the morning hush,
      I am the swift, uplifting rush
      Of quiet birds in circling flight.
      I am the soft starlight at night.

      Do not stand at my grave and weep.
      I am not there, I do not sleep.
      Do not stand at my grave and cry.
      I am not there, I did not die!


      (Mary Frye 1932)



      Then Almitra spoke, saying, "We would ask now of Death."
      And he said:
      You would know the secret of death.
      But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?
      The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.
      If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
      For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.
      In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;
      And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.
      Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.
      Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.
      Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?
      Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?
      For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?
      And what is to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?
      Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
      And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
      And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.


      (Khalil Gibran)


      xx
      Jayne


      "One must have chaos in oneself in order to give birth to a dancing star."

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      • #4
        I have just read your blog post and your tribute to your son and I found them really moving. The person that has caused you such pain now is somebody who through their addiction is unable to comprehend the hurt and pain that they have caused you with their actions. It was a terrible thing to do but what really counts with regard to your son is what you carry in your heart where nobody can reach and destroy your feelings for him. When you are ready maybe you could plant a tree at your home(or something similar) in his memory. It sounds like you are now with a good person who will help you through and as you say your baby's father will carry his guilt for the rest of his life. My thoughts are with you.
        www.littlebead.blogspot.com
        www.twitter.com/littlebead

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        • #5
          sending you {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

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          • #6
            Oh Laura I am so sorry to hear about your son's memorial.

            For this woman to do this and then brag about it in a text message beggars belief, can you not report her to the police for criminal damage?

            All I can say is thank God you have the love of a good man to help you.

            Be strong

            (((((HUGS)))))

            Alice xx
            I started off with nothing and I've still got most if left.

            www.folksy.com/shops/fluffysstuff

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            • #7
              Thank you so much for your comments and messages... they truly mean a lot to me.

              Jayne - those are two very touching poems, and the first is one that we had read at my mums funeral last year so it means a lot to us. The second, is one that I had not read before but is also beautiful. Thank you.

              At the moment I am trying to remain focussed on the positives in life and not letting her actions get to me. We have talked about reporting the incident to the police and having her charged with criminal damage but then I am drawn towards not doing so as I don't want to have to face her or give her the satisfaction of seeing me upset, so at the moment I'm not sure whether to leave it lie and move forward and take this opportunity to start afresh Jordan's memorial and only give details to our closest relatives.

              I love the idea of a memorial tree and this is definitely something that I am going to look into when our garden is sorted out. I am just so thankful that I now have a wonderful husband who understands what I have gone through (we lost a baby nine months after our wedding to a miscarriage) and he knows what this means to me... I am just so glad of his support and love.

              Thank you everyone for your comments and support it really does mean a lot to me.

              LJ xxx

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              • #8
                hi fluffy squirrel, really sorry to read yur blog. I really would tell the police, you have the proof in the text so she couldnt wriggle out of it. I hope things become calmer and you have a relaxing festive seasobn. Hugs.

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                • #9
                  Hi Laura

                  I'm so sorry to hear about what's going on in your life at the moment.

                  Please know that there are good people out there also (your lovely husband's obviously one of them). I hope that whatever you decide to do about her, that you're able to regain a sense of calm and peace that you so deserve.

                  {{{{{Hugs}}}}}

                  Sara
                  Sara

                  For papercrafting and stamping ideas and tips please visit my blog

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                  • #10
                    Thank you both for your lovely messages *hugs*

                    Hubby and I have been for a drive this afternoon just to get away from everything and been talking things over and think we would like a bespoke memorial of some kind making for Jordan, perhaps some sort of angel type thing... I really need to work on getting some idea of what I'd like so that I can price it up and get it sorted out.

                    LJ xxx

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                    • #11
                      Oh Laura, I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through and to hear what has happened to your darling son's memorial is just awful.

                      There's nothing I can say that can make any of it better, so just wanted to send you hugs & love & to let you know that I'm thinking of you.

                      There are some truly dreadful people in this world, but as you have found, there are some truly special ones too, and those are the ones you hold onto & believe in, and don't let the awful ones break you.

                      Jan xxx
                      "Human beings, who are almost remarkable in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so" - Douglas Adams


                      Website: www.janscardsandcrafts.co.uk
                      Blog: http://janscardscraftsandmusings.blogspot.com/
                      Twitter: http://twitter.com/JanJackman
                      Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?...6759167?ref=nf

                      Independent Stampin' Up! Demonstrator

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                      • #12
                        So Sorry. I know you don't know me yet. I don't know what to say? We can only LOVE and be available to one another. It is my belief that only God can heal such deep rooted pain. I also believe that your baby son Jordan was never "up there" with strangers all alone, but our spirit goes back to God who gave it, who knew us before the world was created and Jordan is held in the all powerful, loving arms of God.

                        All I can offer is this - I hope it brings you 'some' comfort. (and may your family have a loving and peaceful Christmastime together - because that's the hope that we all celebrate at Christmas xxx)

                        My Beautiful, Peaceful, Little One,
                        Tiny, Pure and Mild,
                        You're much too good for our world my darling,
                        You are surely God's own Special Child.

                        For you no pain or heartache,
                        No badness to see or hear,
                        My Perfect, Beautiful Baby,
                        You've nothing left to fear.

                        And so my arms are empty,
                        and for me alone I cry,
                        When the darkness closes in on me,
                        I can only wonder ~ Why?

                        The precious time we had together,
                        My deepest Love to You I gave,
                        and all those Special Moments,
                        My mind will always save.

                        I Thank you for being my little one,
                        and although we have had to part,
                        Where ever you are my darling,
                        In your arms you hold my heart.

                        God has gathered in our darling,
                        Placed our bud amoung the flowers,
                        taken back the Child He lent us,
                        To a much better home than ours.
                        (Written by Me. For the funeral of my own Beautiful Baby, lost to stillbirth at 22 weeks)
                        May God give you the peace that goes beyond all human understanding xxx
                        http://alteredangelsattic.blogspot.com/

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                        • #13
                          sorry to hear your sad news, my thoughts are with you at this time. Try and focus on the good and not what has just happened and a tree sounds nice as you can watch it grow and think nice thoughts as you watch it change through the seasons. lots of kind thoughts and hugs.
                          My blog http://setters-delight.blogspot.com

                          Folksy http://www.justgifts.folksy.com

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                          • #14
                            Lots of love...the tree does sounds like a lovely idea. Like roses have names, you may be able to find one called Jordan?
                            Facebook page, Cottage Charms & Cards: http://www.facebook.com/update_secur...20677888001883

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Altered Angel View Post
                              So Sorry. I know you don't know me yet. I don't know what to say? We can only LOVE and be available to one another. It is my belief that only God can heal such deep rooted pain. I also believe that your baby son Jordan was never "up there" with strangers all alone, but our spirit goes back to God who gave it, who knew us before the world was created and Jordan is held in the all powerful, loving arms of God.

                              All I can offer is this - I hope it brings you 'some' comfort. (and may your family have a loving and peaceful Christmastime together - because that's the hope that we all celebrate at Christmas xxx)

                              My Beautiful, Peaceful, Little One,
                              Tiny, Pure and Mild,
                              You're much too good for our world my darling,
                              You are surely God's own Special Child.

                              For you no pain or heartache,
                              No badness to see or hear,
                              My Perfect, Beautiful Baby,
                              You've nothing left to fear.

                              And so my arms are empty,
                              and for me alone I cry,
                              When the darkness closes in on me,
                              I can only wonder ~ Why?

                              The precious time we had together,
                              My deepest Love to You I gave,
                              and all those Special Moments,
                              My mind will always save.

                              I Thank you for being my little one,
                              and although we have had to part,
                              Where ever you are my darling,
                              In your arms you hold my heart.

                              God has gathered in our darling,
                              Placed our bud amoung the flowers,
                              taken back the Child He lent us,
                              To a much better home than ours.
                              (Written by Me. For the funeral of my own Beautiful Baby, lost to stillbirth at 22 weeks)
                              May God give you the peace that goes beyond all human understanding xxx
                              This is an absolutely beautiful piece of writing, thank you so much for sharing this with us.

                              We have several family members in the spirit world and with conatct through mediums I know that Jordan is being well looked after.

                              Thank you for everyone's kind messages *hugs*

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