How do I answer this?

[swirlyarts]

Anya spotted a photo of me and Mr Swirl from years ago when we first started going out and asked where she was. I said that she hadn't been born yet and she didn't like that. So she asked if she was with Nana S or Nana T and when I explained that she hadn't been conceived yet she started to get really upset and was constantly asking 'but where was I??' 'Was I still in your tummy' came out too and I had to change the subject because she was getting really upset.
I'm sorted as to what I'm going to say when she asks about pregnancy etc but honestly, how do I answer the question of where she was before she was even conceived! Bear in mind she is only 4 on Sunday although she is quite bright!

[Seahorse]

Sounds like you need to give her the birds and bees talk.
Just to explain that she had to be made from 2 things, like when she makes a picture out of paper and crayon.

Or you could say that she was waiting in yours and daddys head/mind as she is the child youd always dreamed of and then she was made.

[candles by lisa]

That's a hard one - it is really hard for our kids to realise that we actually had lives before they came along - my two still do that when they see pictures ask where they are - doh it was 18 years ago you weren't born yet!!!

I tried to explain that we are a whole lot older than them but we were baby's at one time too and had to do the same growning up that they are doing just now.

Cheers.

Lisa

:D

[Sommerwood]

Oh bless her, they get so frustrated and puzzled don't they.

Mind you, she must be VERY special as she shares her birthday with me if its this Sunday!!:D

[Tip Top]

Hehehehe!!

Been there, done that with Samuel!! And he's just 4 too! I explained that he came along after we were married (kept asking where he and Jacob were in the photos).

And he accepted that!!! Strangely! Although he did ask a few questions why he had cousins and that their mummmy and daddy only got married earlier this year and pointed out that that was not right......;)

I did the growing in my tummy bit and he's seen all the scans and I think he's sorted on that one......:D

Good luck and good luck with party on Sunday!! Did you get the invites done?!

[swirlyarts]

Yep all invites done and sent out. I've also informed Anya that she isn't getting a fairy night time cake - I won't have time - but she didn't seem too bothered because she now wants a Disney Princess one from Asda!
Anya understands the fact that babies grow inside you and saw the scans from Tara and came with me to the appointments etc although she hasn't yet asked how she got inside my tummy or how she got out :o That's all fact based so I've no problem explaining that as and when but the idea that she wasn't even thought of is a bit trickier!

[Tip Top]

You could also do the bit about how people are older than others (your parents older than you etc). If nothing else it will give her something else to think about!!:D

Good luck with the party and good old Asda eh?!!;)

[colourart]

My 5 year old seems to understand about he came after we were married, he's asked was he in my tummy. I would explain that mummy and daddy got know each other first. Shelley, whos 3 wanted to know how 'people are made', she's asked a couple of times, but I think she's too young for the birds and bees so I told her what we're made from, skin, hair, bones etc. She's been happy with that, I actually think thats what she meant anyway.

[MrSwirl]

The key thing (and medical research proves this) is that it's important that the mother does the explaining, and not the father.

HTH.

[swirlyarts]

The key thing (and medical research proves this) is that it's important that the mother does the explaining, and not the father.

HTH.

Hah hah - you are funny!!

I think I've managed to explain as we got back into it tonight when I spoke about the people who lived in this house before us - 'But where did we live before here' 'Well Mummy and Daddy lived somewhere else' 'But where was I' - you get the picture. So I explained that the special part of mummy that makes up a baby - i.e. you Anya - was in my tummy. And she seemed quite happy with that! I haven't explained about the special bit from Daddy yet :o Hopefully that's another couple of years!